Peace to Potential danger to me!

Yesterday had woke from a healing restorative sleep and had a peaceful good day - cleaning washing got some nice food to eat and then studying, writing and watching good Saturday night TV... Was sat talking to Dante my Syrian refugee on facebook and Skype THEN all this happened here read on -

Had a right carry on at 1am with a loud thud by my door - some drunk collapsed on the ground on my doorstep....with his mate trying to pick him up..... actually must have slipped on fresh Fox poo as the foxes were out on their nightly patrol - dam poo all over the place..... Got rid of the drunk by my MATRON stance and think he was glad to stagger away from me hhhhhh ... But not impressed with clean up swilling path and cleaning my carpet in the early hours from it trodden in my me not noticing till after.... BANK HOLIDAY DRUNKS...!!!!! police were full out on other calls... did not ring them till heard a blood curdling scream from a woman down the road and two fellas fighting over her like Tom Cats ..... but read on further as to why this place and this alarm system is there for my safety... and then think is is right that LBH want to evict me because of failings of welfare cutbacks. When I have paid in tax over the years... Society and this country and this government is a right MESS........

My daughter has been telling me last night with the drunk collapsed on the ground outside my door could have been a near miss. In the next town to me a 90yrs woman was stabbed as she answered the door!!! I have this careline alarm near my door and had my hand ready to thump it as panic button ..... this was one of the reasons I was housed in a Sheltered bungalow given the DV history ... so that I had the back up of an alarm that goes straight to the civic centre security 24hrs. Once triggered  they answer immediately and can hear all that is going on and get the police. When I ring the police they answer with my name as i am on red alert for immediate response if in danger....just in case my perpetrator comes or sends someone to hurt me or "shut" me up... this is what I live with and it is not right when you think that a notice of eviction was served - a breach of duty of care for an over 60yrs DV victim. 

So you see why I am campaigning for a better pathway of support for all women victims of DV and to help them feel safe and secure and well supported while they heal, detox from the ugliness of violence and rebuild their lives in peace.

Drinking and the uncontrolled out of their heads behaviour is quite appalling. There is no self respect or respect for others. It is no wonder Methodists and Muslims are told to abstain from the craziness of alcohol....  I am sorry if I offend those that like a tipple but I have seen too much in my nursing career of the damage drinking does to those that abuse its use.  Every shift in A/E has drunks to cope with no matter the time of day, I have seen too many bruises and injuries from drunkeness and I have  had too many bruises, haematomas and a broken arm from drunken husbands attack on me.... I have seen and nursed the horrible death of advance sclerosis of the liver. One case in resus stands out when his esophageal varices burst and a fountain of blood was seen to come from his mouth over the staff and floor... with bleeding from rectum too... we never did save him no matter how we tried.   

So think before you drink and drink responsibly... 

Britain discovered Talent

Tokio was brilliant tonight on Britains got talent - you truly felt you were on a journey in the music...from the first note he took us all by the hand and led us all the way spellbound.  Amazing talented chap... and cannot understand why no golden buzzer as was truly captivating and took all the audience and judges and me for one at home watching and hearing the artistic production. 

Debussy and Ed Sheeran was the collaboration we never knew we needed! 
Thank you Tokio Rocco well worth a like on his facebook page.... 

Note board

Today

For the many not the few

For the many not the few - financial dignity for the many not the few is what I would like to see. Dignity and respect for all is vital with compassion for the needy as a society without compassion ceases to be a society. 

Interesting facebook interaction: 

"Colin Andrew comments: I have a horrible feeling that Jeremy Corbyn will do better than many people expect. He has this very genuine view that the poor, ignorant, ill educated , dispossessed and socially inadequate citizens get a bad deal. He may be right.

The snag,as always , is that the working tax payer has to pick up the pieces and pay for the less fortunate members of society. The art of politics is knowing where to draw the line and how much tax you can extract from contributers to pay towards supporting non contributors"

MY REPLY:
Colin Andrew dear me Colin open up your frame of reference Doctors are well educated they are being listened to by Jeremy that there is a real crisis in the NHS ...teachers are well educated and being listened to by Jeremy that there is a real crisis in the educational system.... Architects Engineers and Economist are well educated and Jeremy is listening to them that the housing and infrastructure and economy is in crisis ... so who are the ignorant you imply to ........ and a tax payer is all that are on this land from dwellers to tourists to business visitors to migrants as we all have to pay VAT on goods road tax nearly every move we make is taxed... some have had to pay tax to come here on visa application...... those on benefits pay tax on the goods they try to buy with the minimal by present Tory driven law £73.10 a week.... that amount in not jolly hols spending money but they have to pay some council tax to housing to electric to gas to food to clothing... as they are able...... so I suggest you look with a wider lens on life and with an open heart and see that what is happening in our land - that is many are treated unfairly while the few enjoy the fruits of the many..... and suggest you direct your criticism to the Panama hat wearers that leech YOUR tax and others to stuff in to some bank for own needs. We also need to look at tyrants making a fortune out of property in our land and then causing utter havoc in the world to create displaced citizens of their home land to seek safety from their tyrannical rule and attacks upon them....... I think really we have a need to drain a swamp here - you need to ask where is EVERYONE's TAX going as clearly services are suffering and there is evidence of mis-management of our resources...

Woman on Street

image from https://dissentsansfrontieres.com

From my observations today in the East End of London 2017 
Woman on street

Yes on street

With Duvet and sheet.

Man on train

Racking his brain

On which property to invest

Which will be the best

His wealth to make

His fortune from others rake

Woman on street

Yes on street

With duvet and sheet

Man on train

Filling his brain

Reading of his football team

News of a contract dream

The million a rich cream.

Woman on street

Yes on street

With duvet and sheet

Old woman looks on in shame

Not this in my country and in my name.

Yet she is hungry and feeling faint.

The truth of this land she must paint.

Woman on Street

Yes on street

With duvet and sheet

This is London in two thousand and seventeen

With poverty more to be seen

Yet contrasted with the wealthy

Who are looking extremely healthy

Gym, designer clothes and good food they buy

While others a good life denied - yet try 

Woman on Street

Yes on street

With duvet and sheet

Contrast to wide to be ignored

Time to ensure that politicians are implored

Poverty and social pain no more

To make this land a fair land.

With opportunity to make us grand.

for us all once more.

MarjFaith April 2017 lets make our vote the best choice this election!

(Could not take a photo of her bed as this felt intrusive, even though her bed was on the street.... this was her personal space amid the crowds of passerby..)

Invest with Compassion in People

Been sat reading through some of the literature from yesterdays Bloodwise meeting. They are inspiring and a great nursing give to patients that have been diagnosed with blood cancer. They make you feel like arms around you with all the supporting information and access to help. 

But when I read through the IMAGINE leaflet, the amazing research I heard about and the advancements in treatment have not be government funded. This all came about from one family that had lost a child at 6 yrs to leukaemia .. dear little Susan Eastwood who died in 1960. Her family out of their grief and feeling that there had to be a way of beating blood cancers, have created all this charity with fundraising that has been able to help research and improve treatments. Over half a billion pound in the years since have been raised and invested. 

I want to highlight that word INVESTED - something that our present government do not seem to understand.... the most important investment is to invest in your citizens and help them in their time of need to get strong again. Imagine all the miracles if you do invest in people and their needs. 

Looking at the dietary advice for those with blood cancers.... makes me think no government should have have folk on foodbanks, or presenting in hospital from hunger and malnutrition... yes happening in the UK 2017!  To have this happen is be be a failed government. Folk need to eat well have access to good food to keep well. More so when they are in a challenge of something like cancer. You do need better DWP support as an investment in the journey to wellness and to beat the cancer and to meet all the treatment challenges....... 

TIME GOVERNMENTS INVESTED WITH COMPASSION IN PEOPLE.. AND IMAGINE THE MIRACLES THAT COULD HAPPEN IN SOCIETY?

It was heartwarming yesterday talking with the patient survivors about why I was there at the meeting - the reason to raise awareness of the fact we have among our refugees cancer patients from war zones. I was there at the meeting to revise and learn as the retired RN RM with time out of practice in oncology. The was such a heart to heart link up with this what I was sharing as one woman said... "OMG we have been so lucky to have this treatment here in peace, how awful that there are others in the world that have this because of war and because of war have limited or no access to treatments."

YES Governments that make war and pain need to be brought to full accountability. Remember many targeted civilians have been in besieged areas deliberately starved of food... and all the basic human needs to keep well. 

All governments and world leaders FAIL when there is war, politically induced pain and when they fail to invest in their people.... 

Time man grew up and stopped stupidity 

and 

but KIND back into manKIND.......

Read more about the amazing work of the Bloodwise charity on their website link https://bloodwise.org.uk/

What A Wonderful World With David Attenborough - BBC One

Earth Day to remind us of the precious jewel this planet is within the Universe..... and we really need to stop the wars and man made pain for us all and the this wonderful world. 

Slough Art in Uxbridge

A fresh display of art in the Uxbridge Library from the Slough Art Society. 

Bloodwise meeting today

This is where I have been on the first meeting of the day... and a brilliant morning of sharing .. very stimulating... and was able to get my concern over the Syrian refugees and incidence of cancers including leukaemia.  This was a good meeting for me to revise and add to my knowledge from the time I worked in oncology as a nurse........Had two meetings but all round Russel Square so was able to attend this Bloodwise conference at the UCL Institute of Child Health and then nip round to SOAS to the Syria Solidarity UK meeting.

I am fascinated by the family of cells generated by stem cells.  I was asking about at birth best to clamp cord and harvest stem cells to store in a bank for the future - or to not clamp cord and allow natural transfusion of the cord blood with stem cell.  Then also given we were in the child health institute and some of the cancers being seen at the Turkish/Syria border got me thinking on the role of the Thymus gland in childhood and whether friend or foe in the look at blood cancers.  One of the doctors was able to tell me he had been working on such a question.  So need to read up on his work.  That is a day in the library sorted...!!

The treatment that fascinates me is the antibody therapy with the naked antibody that identifies abnormal cell markers, then you can load these antibodies with toxins to destroy the cancer cells.  I need to read more on this to share with you later. 

Managed to get some leaflets to distribute to my GP surgery, Uxbridge Healthwatch and will drop some in the Community Cancer Centre.. 

You can also learn more from the website 

https://bloodwise.org.uk/

The impact of Cancer

art: Picasso 

The impact of Cancer diagnosis

This is an extract from a novel I have been writing called “Closer to your heart”  It is about a dynamic couple that have a great loving and creative relationship that is invaded by Lisa finding a breast lump.  Lisa is a successful business woman and her life is turned upside down with her diagnosis of breast cancer. She in the early stage of this journey shuts out her husband Charles, but together they work with this new journey that life has brought them.

A day in a muddle

Lisa felt her mind to be disjointed with thoughts and feelings. Nothing making sense anymore. Thoughts flying in slow motion around in her head that brought feelings of being in an unreal world.  Everyone was using the usual markers of appointment times and the hours in the day, but since the words of the doctor were heard she felt in a muzzy and fuzzy world. Showering and dressing was out of habit but took longer due to freeze frames of finding herself staring at the misty tiles of the shower unit.  Or gazing into the light filled stream of water from the shower that cascaded around her body.  Her body not feeling to belong to her anymore, numbed from the usual sensations of warmth and cleansing and perfumed smells of her favourite shower gels.  

Looking in the mirror she could see a face but could no longer see it has hers, rather some image looking back at her as if independently saying “who are you?”

She struggled to find the new identity those words spoken by the doctor had given her. She was a cancer patient not just Lisa but a cancer patient. It was almost as if she had been placed in a new room of her life that she did not recognise.  This new identity bore no resemblance to anything she owned nor reflected any part of her. She was in a dulled world with no way of knowing how to get out this surreal world. A world that forbade her to retrace her steps back to the world she had known full of vibrancy and energy and plans for the future.  A place now in this new time that felt full of illusions and nothing to grasp to give her direction. Nothing made sense, was this a dream to wake from. All her senses dulled.

As if in the distance in some outer world she could just about smell the coffee that Maria her housekeeper was making. She would eat the breakfast prepared but as if an automaton with no taste or sharpening of mind. Her mind in some fog with her thoughts heard echoing in that fog enclave, the strongest thought of all was a question that kept coming over and over again- Why has this invaded her life?  Then a panic button pressed in her head to think this invasion in her life could take her life.  Then an all engulfing thought that overwhelmed her in a tidal wave of pain, that she could die.

She looked up at Charles and Maria on the patio where she loved to have her morning breakfast.  She smiled and said quietly almost in a whisper, “its ok it will be a mistake the results could be wrong.”  This was it the fog for the moment became clear – yes it was a mistake maybe they muddled the test results with someone else.  They did not belong to her. The word cancer did not belong to her.  She did not need to claim it – it could take no claim on her.  It was not hers to claim or even acknowledge.

It pained Charles to see his beautiful Lisa wandering round lost in the house, half dressed and none of her usual make up ready for the day ahead. Rather now she looked like some survivor of a bombing and was dazed. But then has he reflected on that thought – yes a bombshell had hit their lives, shattering all that was familiar.  He put a hand on her shoulder and turned her to face him.  Fixing her gaze with his and saying,

“Lisa we will get through this. We can fight it together.”

He pulled her closer to him and she could feel the warmth and the strength of him. His arms around her felt to cocoon her and protect her from the weird world she had found herself in. She stood with him holding her tight falling into his chest and arms. Then in the safety of his hold she let go with her knees buckling under her.   She screamed over and over again – “I don’t want this!” and then the tears came in floods blurring her eyes.

Charles held her tight and felt impotent against the anguish she was in. What could he do to save his wife.  He stroked her hair and kissed her and whispered over and over again “I love you Lisa you are my lady and we will fight this together”  he gently pulled her away from him to look her in her eyes and added, “we will win Lisa we will win”

Maria ran into the kitchen, her apron pulled up to dry her eyes, she could not bear seeing such a loving couple facing this pain. She even felt guilty why couldn’t it be her instead. She looked at the Madonna picture she had pinned on the wall and prayed that Lisa would be made well.

MarjFaith

The Light between Oceans

Sometimes you just need to sit quiet and read ... and found this £1 book in the market yesterday. The Light between Oceans has been made into a film but I did not get to see it..... but I do believe the DVD is out now....

Relaxing afternoon in Parliament

Been in Westminster Hall today to quietly view the tapestry display of the Scottish influence in the world. I was to meet a friend and colleague to see this together and discuss my petition ... But she got called away to another meeting in London ... However we had at least a good talk on the phone.  The tapestry display is in Parliament till the 29th April so I hope to go again with my friend before the exhibition is moved up to Scotland. 

This tapestry reminded us of the Scottish PMs that have been in no 10.  There was quite a fuss outside parliament today with Mrs May announcing the general election.  I managed to do a couple of pieces to camera and had a great time with some student journalists from the Middlesex Uni.. 

The tapesteries are well impressive with both design and stitching. 
Was a lovely atmosphere quiet and contemplative with relaxation.  I treated myself to reasonable priced lunch in the Jubilee cafe and never seen the cafe so quiet.  Staff lovely and caring as they usually are with me. I do like my time in Parliament as an activist member of the public. 

It was good to take photos this time round... the exhibition is free you get a free ticket at the Cromwell Green entrance and then go through security. Westminster Hall is vast and actually a great place for exhibitions. I was suggesting that we had a set of stalls and stands on all the organisations and individual projects working with the refugees.  This would be good to get the MPs seeing what good work is being done and how to interconnect to help the refugees rebuild their lives around the UK and Europe. 

Here is a further selection of my photos today.... Very apt to be looking at Scotland in the world with now a renewed look at the Scottish interest in the new election call.  

You can download the app from the website to view the tapestries with the rolling scroll and magnification to view the work.  Each has all the story behind the design and country of influence.  Plus there is a book available but the parliament book shop as temporarily sold out of this. 

http://www.parliament.uk/visiting/visiting-parliament-news/scottish-diaspora-tapestry-in-westminster-hall-between-20-march-and-29-april-2017/

Love the colours and particularly the ones featuring India and Pakistan. This work is definitely a must see. I think you will never tire of it as you spot something new with each look and visit. 

http://www.scottishdiasporatapestry.org/

Shop together to help

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Looking at all ways to help raise funds for my Family Link Up project I joined NYR organic as an independent consultant last year... you can earn by party plan, table top sales and online sales.  I have always loved NYR products and used to buy from their flagship shop in Covent garden when I was in practice as RN RM...... I would often recommend the comfry for my mothers for "certain area discomfort" following delivery.... My paedriatric nurse colleagues would recommend the Baby Balm and Barrier cream.  So with faith and a passion for the products I could see this would be a way to help to earn now in my retirement and for the Family Link Up Project

http://marjoriesyard.blogspot.co.uk/

https://uk.nyrorganic.com/shop/marjoriebahhaj/area/shop-online/

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NYR commission to help? 
April 15th 2017 But sadly to date I  have not got any orders from NYR business plan.  I can't run around doing party plans so I am reliant on developing an online customer base.   If I could achieve a good loyal base then I can a) look after my valued customers with extra goodies and promotions,   b) I could get commission to help my Family Link Up project.  c) The business turnover would generate extra consultant products for me to put together as raffle baskets for fundraising. d) as the turnover swells I can then think of helping other charities with stock purchase for table top fundraising venues for a charity of your choice - where there can be shared donation. Plus put charity fundraising baskets together for other charities to raffle.

✿✿Boshra in the Eleonas camp✿✿ 

- who is a business graduate -would love to help rebuild her life.

You can read more about the project and visits on my Family Link Up blog

✿  http://linkupsyrianfamily.blogspot.co.uk/✿

There is actually a NYR shop in Athens so who knows with her language learning in Greek and English and when permitted to work she could get an opportunity with shop assistant work too... as the girls grow and get to school.

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Basically I need some turn over of business activity and I can only do this with customers registering with me online.  NYR handles your order but notifies me of the order so I can send you extra gifts and promotions... all to swell your shopping basket with grateful thanks....  The products are amazingly good and are award winning.... you will enjoy them and feel and look good with their care. 

https://uk.nyrorganic.com/shop/marjoriebahhaj/area/shop-online/
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Lets win together with great winner products to look and feel good 

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Petals and Frills

The Forgotten Garden

Elegant and Pretty

Beautiful display and a good tip for keeping flowers from Wohnen & Garten.  I miss living in Germany with the lovely elegant homely ideas they have.  Had a precious 6 monat im Munchen 1992

"Frohe Ostern, ihr Lieben. Wir haben da noch eine hübsche last-minute Idee für die Ostertafel. Uner Tipp: Mit etwas feuchter Erde in den Eierschalen halten die Blüten ca. 2-3 Tage durch."

Happy Easter, my dears. We've got another pretty last-minute idea for Easter. Essential Tip: with a little bit of damp earth in the egg shells hold the flowers approx. 2-3 days.

Easter pretty

Magie du Son et de l'Image

اجمل اغنية تركية - Beautiful Turkish song 2016

İrem Derici - Kalbimin Tek Sahibine

Bangır Bangır أغنية تركية جميلة جدا دي جاي راقص 2015-2016

Expecting a Perfect Start ....

Had a quiet afternoon reading the recently published report on our local maternity services.  We have in the London Borough of Hillingdon had an extra challenge to face with the closure of the neighbouring borough maternity unit at Ealing hospital.  This is part of the "Shaping a Healthier Future" for the North West of London.   The mothers now have to come to Hillingdon Hospital from the catchment area of Southall and Ealing.  I personally cannot see the logic in a growing population and a denser population in a small geographical area of closing units and putting pressure on another.  In the catchment area for Hillingdon area we have seen much needed apartment buildings in Hayes, West Drayton and Yiewsley .... they are popular executive look buildings with easy access to the city of London on the rail network to Paddington..... So this is attracting young couples and the inevitable happens babies come along.... !!

In Southall and the surrounding area of Ealing there are new builds and multiple rents for families, overcrowded houses turned into a maximum rent gain by landlords squashing in families - even to converting sheds into studio apartments.  This means intensification of the density of population and the result is babies come..!! 

So it soon becomes apparent that you need more maternity services not a reduced or uni-focal one.  Because of density of population roads become congested and it becomes difficult to get to that uni-focal maternity unit in a time of need or even to routine appointments.  

This does come out in the report too of the mothers fear of getting to Hillingdon in time from Ealing.  Also there is a cost burden to the need to travel.  This actually is not only a personal cost to travel, but I am thinking it is likely many will call for an ambulance in labour to ensure quick arrival at the maternity unit. So there is a spin off cost to the support services with this point alone. 
One thing that is not addressed in the report is the spatial arrangement of Hillingdon hospital.  We have for many years been asking for a complete rebuild of a new hospital but this has been promised and promised but not happened as yet.  The maternity unit is a small area given the need now to accommodate extra clients.   Now this does come out in the report in the fact that Antenatal facilities feel over crowded.  There is an innovative request for a text message to let women know when they are to be seen... so that they can go out in the grounds or away from the clinic to reduce the congestion.    But compared to other units I have practiced in as a midwife the unit is small. Leeds maternity unit in the Clarendon Wing is spacious and our Birth Unit at St Tommys is spacious... mind you Tommys does have an edge on the fact it is the best place in the city to hang out with all the Tourist views on the doorstep! 
But if you are to merge units with workload doubling then there needs to be a building respect for this and space allocation. This is out of creating a good ambiance for clients and staff to be in but also out of safety as there will be a proportional increase in potential emergencies.   
There is in the report no indication of midwifery led units being built to ease the situation in key points in the catchment areas.... I am thinking back to the what was called the GP unit..... we had such in Otley General when I was having my girls.... this was really a midwifery led unit with call of GP for some obstetric need... but emergencies were blue light transfered to Leeds and then we had alternate days take between St James's University Hospital obstetric unit and Leeds Maternity unit - now the Clarendon Wing in LGI...... But many a good SVD was achieved in this midwifery led unit without a need to call the doctor... as indeed in many midwifery led units nationwide. 

In the report the women had highlighted conflicting advice on breastfeeding.  The hospital has bedside TV channels and it worked well in St Thomas's for there to be a TV hospital produced channel for breastfeeding advice and demos to ensure all singing from the same hymn sheet of advice. It was something that women could watch at anytime as was on a rolling replay.  There was also a large sitting room where midwives could gather mothers for a group help session on breastfeeding problems and how to problem solve.  This was supporting on many issues to share and help realise common concerns are not a failing of any one mother to be a mother.  The common guilt trip that can mentally torment a woman if she perceives she is failing at breast feeding when in fact it can be a problem many have and can be solved.  Of course there needs to be a calm mind to help with breast milk let down.  One mother comes to my mind how we relieved her engorgement and her sudden pride as she saw lots of her breast milk ejaculating out of her breasts....Bless her and her baby was guzzling well satisfied with the new supply. 

I am so glad I followed an internal impression to call in the Healthwatch Hillingdon centre in the Pavillons in Wednesday and found copies of this report. Found it a stimulating read as a retired midwife and there is a lot more to look at too.. 

Here is the link to find out more about the Expecting a Perfect Start Report plus more of the work that Healthwatch does.... 
http://healthwatchhillingdon.org.uk/index.php/2017/03/12903/